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| While we were not able to find any photos of Herr May with a cat (which is probably a good thing), here's photo of Brian looking like he's ready to positively chow down on an innocent baby fox-type creature. |
WE THINK YOU SHOULD HAS RUNG THE ALARM FOR THE WHOLE WORLD TO HEAR REGARDING FELINE SOUL-EATER "DR." BRIAN MAY, COMMANDER OF THE BRITISH EMPIRE'S FALSE LOVE OF ANIMALS - AND NOW THE MAINSTREAM PRESS HAS PUBLISHED A BIZARRE AND STOMACH-TURNING TALE OF HOW PERMO WATCHED A PRECIOUS CAT SUFFER TO DEATH - JUST FOR THE SADISTIC THRILL.
THE LANCASTER GAURDIAN GLOSSES OVER THE STORY WITH THE SUGAR-COATED HEADLINE "DYING CAT COMFORTED BY QUEEN LEGEND". THE ARTICLE PURPORTS THAT MAY "TRIED TO SAVE A DYING CAT", WHICH HAD BEEN "HIT BY A CAR", BY "STROKING IT FOR HALF AN HOUR - UNTIL IT DIED". REALLY, BRIAN? LAST TIME I CHECKED, PETTING A CAT WHILE EATING ITS SOUL TO STAY ALIVE FOREVER REALLY ISN'T THE BEST WAY TO "SAVE" A CAT'S LIFE...FIRST I THINK I'D TRY TAKING IT TO THE FUCKING VET! EVEN IF THE CAT WAS GOING TO DIE ANYWAY, THE VET'S OFFICE WAS ONLY MINUTES AWAY - EUTHANASIA WOULD HAVE BEEN FAR MORE HUMANE THAN MAKING THE POOR KITTY SUFFER THROUGH RICH UNCLE EYEBAGS' SIGNATURE DEATH GRIP AND TERRIFYING SOUL SUCKING FOR AN ENTIRE HALF HOUR OF AGONIZING INTERNAL HEMMORHAGING! BASHING ITS SKULL IN WITH A ROCK WOULD'VE BEEN A NICER SENDOFF FOR THE POOR THING, FOR GOD'S SAKE!
"May was driving when he approached the cat lying in the road. He spent about a half an hour with it, stroking it until it DIED"
SEVERAL CONCERNED CAT LOVERS HAVE COMMENTED ON MAY'S PERVERSE FELINE DEATH-STROKE INCIDENT, LEAVING COMMENTS SUCH AS THE FOLLOWING:
# Graham simpson Says:
December 6th, 2010 at 7:36 am
How about take the cat to a vet!?????
you sat their and let it die , you cruel cruel cruel cruel cruel man!!!
EmmHaych
Thursday, November 25, 2010 at 07:28 PM
If he was caring he'd have just rung its neck as soon as he found it and not wait 30 minutes for it to die in agony.
HollyBridge
Saturday, November 20, 2010 at 02:07 PM
Instead of sitting there as in some publicity stunt why didn't he drive it to the nearest vets?? Im sure there was a vets surgery in the village or near by.. 30mins is a long time to sit and do nothing to help!!
INDEED, THIS ISN'T HERR MAY'S FIRST TIME AT THE PROVERBIAL CAT-KILLING RODEO. THE ILL-KEMPT INCUBUS WROTE A SONG CALLED "ALL DEAD, ALL DEAD" IN REFERENCE TO HIS DECEASED CAT, SQUEAKY.
OUR EXPERT OPINION ADVICE TO ANYONE LIVING IN THE SURREY AREA: IF YOU WANT THEM TO LIVE, KEEP YOUR CATS THE HELL INSIDE! ONCE MAY GETS A TASTE FOR THE BLOOD, FLESH, AND LIFE ESSENCE OF A NEW SPECIES OF ANIMAL, HE CAN'T GET ENOUGH.
REMEMBER THE DODOS...
TAGS: BRIAN MAY HATES ANIMALS PART INFINITY, CAT KILLERS, SOUL EATERS, ANCIENT UNCHAINED EVIL, CAT TORTURE SCARES, GAY SCARES, CATS IN STUMP MODE, COW CATS, DEEP CHEEK PAIN, EVIL RINGLEADERS, SINISTER MASTERMINDS, BUTLERS FRIGHTENED FOR THEIR LIVES, RAMSHACKLE VULTURE CAGES, TINY SLAVES WHEREABOUTS UNCLEAR, TINY SLAVES FEARED DEAD, CUSTOM BUILD CAT DISPLAY CASES, E.T. WHITE IN THE RIVER, GENE WILDER RED IN THE RIVER, BIRDS OF A FEATHER, TIM CURRY ILLUMINATI SLAVE?, BLADE DOLLS BEHAVING BADLY, RUSTY LYNN CAT CUSTODY BATTLE, BRODIUMS, BANANA BEARS, MEOWMAS, PIPINIS, MOO MEN
STAY TUNED FOR OUR NEXT IN-DEPTH ARTICLE, THE HIGHLY-ANTICIPATED "FREDDIE'S ALTER EGOS, PART DEUX: BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY - THE DEATH OF FARROKH BULSARA", COMING SOON FROM YOUR EXPERT OPINION ADVISERS.
