Rich Uncle Eyebags EXPOSED in new hard-hitting interview

The mentally troubled guitarist poses mugshot-style next to a creepy fisheye mirror while trying to appear "in control" during a photoshoot for the article.


Rachel Cooke of The Observer, welcome.

You have joined We Think You Should in an elite circle of journalists: those who dare to expose Brian May and his lies. Up til now, the bloggers at WTYS have been alone in keeping a watchful eye on Dr. Bri, but Ms. Cooke has now emerged with an explosive article in which she dares to call the frizzy-haired narcissist out on several lies and misrepresentations, questions May's sudden interest in animal rights ("Sure enough, next time I check his blog, Bri is in a state about, among other things, the coalition's attitude to animals: 'Probably the most unsympathetic we have ever seen,' he says, which makes me think his history is a little on the shaky side"), and finally gets Permo to admit that former Queen bassist John Deacon will not even speak to him. She points out his reputation as a huge asshole and acknowledges that May's Soapbox blog suggests that the permed guitarist has serious anger issues, even going to the length of comparing May to Michael Douglas in "Falling Down". Ms. Cooke's concerns about Herr May are so on-point that we cannot help but wonder: is she an avid WTYS reader? She is the first mainstream journalist to call May out on the issues that WTYS has been reporting on since day one.

You can read her article here, but let your EXPERT OPINION advisers give you the breakdown:

BM GETS CAUGHT IN SEVERAL LIES:

-Straight off, Ms. Cooke mentions the fact that May's claim (during his infamous feud with David Parsons) that he "lived in the Country [sic]" was a blatant lie, pointing out that in truth, May lives right around the corner from a luxury golf course in Surrey.

-At one point May tells Ms. Cooke "I want to look in control" in the photo for the article. Later on, while ranting about his faux-love of animals, he insists "I'm not worried about my reputation". Kind of a contradiction there, huh Bri?

-May claims, despite "having voted Conservative all of his life", that it was "a shock" to May when he "discovered" that Conservatives have always voted pro-bloodsports.

-May states "I always promised myself that if I achieved my dreams, I would devote a year of my life to making life better for animals" when he's confronted with explaining his sudden interest in animal rights. Sounds like a defensive, jerk-reaction lie...why, in all of his endless Soapbox ranting, would he never have brought up that point before...if it was the genesis of his "SAVE-ME" campaign, you'd think he would have told that story already.

BM PRETTY MUCH ADMITS HIS "I LOVE ANIMALS" IMAGE IS A FARCE:

"I'd rather be in my studio. I don't want to be here doing this crap", May says in regard to his animal rights campaigning. Ms. Cooke notes May's reluctance to look her in the eye while discussing the topic.

BM CALLS FREDDIE "SCARY" AND "A MADMAN":

"We still weren't sure [about him]. There was a great feeling of danger."

BM SIMULTANEOUSLY VICTIMIZES HIMSELF AND TRIES TO LOOK LIKE HE CARES ABOUT HIS EX-WIFE:

"The worst time is when you're getting divorced. They love some hint of marital strife. It was appalling, utter misery for my ex-wife [he and Mullen divorced in 1988] and children."....geez, Bri, that's a pretty stark turn from your Howard Stern interview where you laughed and agreed that she'd be better off dead (see "Brian May: The Devil-Worshiping Illuminatist Part 2").

BM EVADES QUESTIONS REGARDING HIS MYSTERIOUS FALLING OUT WITH JOHN DEACON:

"No, we never completely… We got strained at the time, but…"

BM MIGHT BE A HOARDER:

"But still, it's mildly astonishing how much, well, stuff there is everywhere. It's like being at your granny's, only on a grand scale: things put down but never moved. Buddhas, Chinese dragons, photos of Brian, cardboard cut-outs of Brian, candles, cuddly penguins, Star Wars figures, a bathroom gift set (still in its box), a clockwork Snoopy… The entire place is festooned."

BM IS CREEPY AS FUCK:

"...he insists that his driver run me to the edge of his property, for all that it would take me only two minutes to walk. So this, embarrassingly, is what happens. At the end of the drive, I hop out, and the [electric, wrought-iron] gates close smoothly behind me, as if controlled by some ghostly hand. I expect I'm on camera."


It must be pointed out that although WTYS wholeheartedly endorses Ms. Cooke's work, we are somewhat disappointed that she did not mention May's penchant for wearing fur and leather products, his keeping of tiny pocket slaves, or his lie about ceasing to use/sell Brian May brand leather guitar straps. Though any journalist who dares to call May out on the constant, blatant, ridiculous lies he spews deserves praise, we would still like to see some more hardball questions thrown at the "World's Grumpiest Rock Star".


TAGS: HELP FOR PATHOLOGICAL LIARS, BOMBSHELL ARTICLES, EXPOSING THE TRUTH ABOUT BRIAN MAY, LUDICROUS PERMS, GROSS EYEBROW SITUATIONS, BRIAN MAY HATES ANIMALS, WORLD'S GRUMPIEST ROCK STARS, THE OBSERVER, FEUD WITH JOHN DEACON, BRIAN MAY CAN'T STOP TALKING SHIT ABOUT FREDDIE MERCURY, FALLING DOWN, ELECTRIC WROUGHT-IRON FENCES, MINSTREL'S GALLERY, THE LONG HARD ROAD TO HELL, TINY SLAVES TELL ALL, SERIOUS EGO TRIPS, CROSS-DRESSING MONTENEGRO STYLE, BRIAN MAY DRUG SHAME, MEAT LOAF IN DANGER, BRI'S SOAPBOX, THREEWAYS WITH SLASH AND ANITA AFTER TEA TIME, HOLLOW MOON THEORY, SATELLITE TIME-SYNCHS, BRIAN MAY/KERRY ELLIS AFFAIR?